The Buddha had to be nagged three times before agreeing to allow for an order of nuns. He declared that such allowance would shorten the lifespan of the Dharma upon the earth. Yet he agreed that women were as able to become enlightened as were men.
Based on this information, I investigated further in relation to my own situation. Why did the Buddha not agree instantly, stating these two side facts, rather than waiting for the third continued request for an order of nuns? Perhaps to show his reluctance, rather than to ensure the determination of the women, based on the rest of what it is claimed he said. Women were able to become enlightened. I did not doubt that my side of the species were any lesser evolved spiritually.
Stepping into today's world, I can see a parallel running. Feminism erupted, with women wanting to do the same thing as men in the same way, rather than in our own way outwardly, whilst retaining equality within the spirit. Just as their being nuns lessens the lifespan of the Dharma, feminism will lessen the lifespan of the natural female lifestyle.
Holding to the belief that women should be equal in spirit, but retain our natural role within life, I personally could not join a nunnery. I am not willing to lessen the lifespan of the Dharma, or play any part in so doing. Likewise, recognizing and accepting my natural role, I choose to remain solely a housewife and mother, rather than to become a female man and obtain a wealth-creating career.
I therefore chose to live within the framework of a lay-Buddhist. I opted to live a simple life, based on my natural role of house care and family responsibilities. To do so within today's society, I need the support and protection of a man - which I do not have literally, only spiritually. This presents me with multiple problems. I feel it is wrong for me to join in society's game, where women are expected to make money and have careers, yet am unable to live4 correctly in my man's literal home. I do not have enough money to live from without earning or having a man provide. I additionally feel unable to join a nunnery.
I feel trapped. I am aware of the correct way for me to live, but can find no way for me to live that way. It is like coming upon a T-junction when you wish to go straight ahead and finding that you can only turn left or right. I can neither head towards society's wrongful role, where feminism makes men out of women, nor can I willingly turn towards the Dharma-shortening role of the nun. I simply wish to live a simple life in the style a woman naturally should.
My solution was to attempt to work from home, running my life based on natural instinct, living simply and studying Buddhism, mingled with an at-home career, to follow neither the path of society nor that of the nun. I need to pay the rent, bills, and food, nothing more. I have an overseas partner to love me spiritually. Writing, designing, photography - creative work I can do in between cleaning the floor, mowing the lawn, stirring a curry, and taking Buddhist classes, practicing Yoga, and reading Buddhist literature.
Unfortunately, I am not yet making enough money to support myself. This is like being on a push-bike, stopped at a T-junction; a car has now parked behind me, and is beeping at me to turn either left or right - but I am only able to chose "ahead", which is not an option. I am neither willing to shorten the lifespan of the Dharma, nor to accept the wrongful lifestyle that is being increasingly encouraged, if not enforced.
When there is no remainder of the Dharmic truth, life upon this planet would become even more unbearable than it currently is. To join in the race towards a meaningless life with a mass-flock of government led sheep is equally unacceptable. Something inside of me will not allow me to do the wrong thing - I have to keep right, even if I am the last human-being to remain so. When reborn, life would only be worse than it currently is, were either available option to be chosen, so I cannot choose.
A woman can find peace, truth, purpose, and become enlightened whilst performing her natural role. A woman can meditate whilst doing simple chores such as cleaning, cooking, washing, and gardening. However, there are now machines that are supposed to improve our life by stealing these opportunities from us, freeing us to become what we are not suited to becoming. If women do not stop following the trend of society and becoming female men, the Dharma will be as lost as were we all to become nuns!
