Do you ever feel overwhelmed? You know what I mean, right? Work, bills, softball practice, it just never stops. But what about your daughter? How old is she? Two years, ten years, or twenty years, it really doesn't matter. There's a good chance, at times, she feels overwhelmed by her world as well. The good news is that fathers of the world play an amazing role in how your daughter handles the disappointments of life! Let me explain.
Two events happened recently that got me thinking about my daughter and my role as her father. Our role as fathers is to prepare our daughters for the path that they will face in life. It's tempting sometimes to try and prepare the path for our daughters, but we must resist. Raising good daughter's means preparing them to deal positively with life's obstacles. Recently I attended a candlelight Christmas service at church. I'm sure you've been to one. In the beginning the room is completely dark except for one candle. As people begin lighting each others candles the room becomes progressively brighter.
The analogy is simple. Spread the light of God and together we can brighten a dark world. Like I said, it's a simple analogy but it always makes an impact on me. There's definitely a positive lesson to teach your daughter if she's old enough to attend one of these services. The key to making this work, however, is that you must be connected to God. What happens if you or your daughter is not connected? What happens if we take that analogy and turn it around? Let me give you an example of what I mean.
A few nights after the candlelight service I brought my daughter home, put her in pajamas, gave her some milk, and began rocking her for bed time. She was exhausted so it wasn't long until she was out, breathing heavy, and as disconnected from reality as possible. The problem was that I didn't shut the door to her bedroom. Normally, shutting the door would be standard procedure because it keeps the light out of the room and prevents distractions, but tonight I was home alone and my wife wouldn't be home for a while. Well, guess what, my wife got home early. My daughter had only been out for a couple of minutes so she was still vulnerable to noise and distractions. You've been there before, right. You're trying not to breathe too loud for fear of waking her up. You say all the silent prayers like, “please God don't let the sound of me rubbing my eyelid wake her from her slumber.”
I hear my wife come into the kitchen and I'm thinking to myself, “please, please, please don't turn on the hall light.” If she turns on the light then it will flood the room and wake my daughter. But I can't just yell down the stairs for her not to turn on the light because that would wake her as well. My wife begins coming up the stairs, I hear her pause, and I start to panic because I know what's happening next. CLICK! The light comes on and floods the room. In a split second I see my daughter begin to squirm, “oh no, she's going to wake up”, but with my quick mind and cat like reflexes I simultaneously throw my hand up to create a shadow over her eyes. The squirming stops, problem solved, Daddy saves the day. My wife peaks in the room, sees what has happened and turns the light off allowing me to drop my arm.
That's when it hit me. As I looked at my daughter surrounded by light all over her body except for her eyes I realized something profound. If we are disconnected from God the smallest darkness can seem overwhelming even when we are surrounded by light. If she had been awake (connected) she would have pushed my shadow creating arm out of the way and said, “Daddy, let's play.” The darkness over her eyes from my shadow would have gone unnoticed because of all the light in the room. She wouldn't have missed a beat. But she didn't, she was asleep, disconnected from reality, and despite the fact that ninety-nine percent of the room was lit, the smallest darkness kept her disconnected.
Jesus said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”1 As fathers we should teach our daughters the importance of believing in someone bigger than us. We are human, and although we will try not to, we will fail to meet their expectations at times. So why God? God gives help and a promise of hope. We are limited, He is not. We can't be there all the time, but He is there all the time. We can't deprive our daughter of these necessities as they navigate life. Our daughters don't care about what we tell them but they do care about what we show them. Does your daughter see you pray? Does she see you reading your Bible? Does she see you turn to God when something unfortunate happens? Keeping them connected keeps them in the light, and keeping them connected means embracing the help and hope that God provides and modeling it for them daily.
1 John 8:12
